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Norman Silver: in the old old days
(from Age, Sex, Location, Colchester: tXt cafe, 2006)

in the old old days
b4 there were mobile fones
how cud a boy eva meet
a person of the oppsite gender

& even if they cud get acquainted
wivout a mobile fone
how cud they ch@
each uvver up

& even if they cud natter
wivout a mobile fone
how cud they stay in touch
if they were in diffrent classes

& even if they could communic8
wivout a mobile fone
how cud they flirt
or get 2 kno each uvver

& even if they cud get close
wivout a mobile fone
how cud they say gudnight

Norman Silver: txt commandments

1. u shall luv ur mobil fone with all ur hart
2. u & ur fone shall neva be             apart
3. u shall nt lust aftr ur neibrs fone nor thiev
4. u shall b prepard @ all times 2 tXt & 2 recv
5. u shall use LOL & othr acronyms in conversatns
6. u shall be zappy with ur ast*r*sks & exc!matns!!
7. u shall abbrevi8 & rite words like theyr sed
8. u shall nt speak 2 sum1 face2face if u cn msg em insted
9. u shall nt shout with capitls XEPT IN DIRE EMERGNCY +
10. u shall nt consult a ninglish dictnry

Poetry quoted by David Crystal in
Txtng. The Gr8 Db8, Oxford University Press 2008

David Crystal, linguistics professor, writes: “Texting has added a new dimension to language use, indeed, but its long-term impact on the already existing varieties of language is likely to be negligible. It is not a bad thing.” My favorite lines from this book are taken from a poem by Julia Bird:

it splits my @oms
wen he :-)s @ me.

Buy this book! And read more about it in November @Spotlight.


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